It’s one of the easiest things that you can possibly do, but after a divorce process, it may take a lot of courage to simply breathe. Waking up in the morning, starting your day, and going to work all require a level of effort that is not always easy before, during, or after a divorce.
In an effort to continue facing the noise of marital discord and a draining and emotional divorce, some may look to hold their breath and suffer through the physical, mental, emotional, and financial challenges that the process may take, in the hope that it will not last forever and that the light at the end of the tunnel will make it all worthwhile.
After a divorce, the journey towards a brighter version of that light at the end of the tunnel begins.
Sigh of relief
When a divorce is finalized, you’re able to let out a sigh of relief at the thought of this process being over. All of the time spent on every detail separating the one life that you shared with your ex-spouse into two is a thought of the past, as is all of the time spent with your family law attorney, planning the best course of action to fit your unique situation.
However, you may not be breathing easy yet.
Revisiting legal issues
You may be forced to revisit this issue. Due to the uniqueness of every given divorce and child custody situation, it is important to stay in contact with your family law attorney, who is prepared to offer their services on any issue being reassessed.
Having a family law attorney in your corner may help you breathe a little easier, but you also need to have a plan in place, laying out where you go from here. The divorce process can be incredibly arduous, taking away the energy that may be required for planning ahead.
Planning and expectations
However, it is vital to have a plan. You need to know where you are going to live after the divorce is finalized, how much money you will have after all of your costs have been paid and your assets divided, and how the divorce decree affects alimony and child support. You need the facts.
With realistic expectations regarding the future in mind, you are better equipped to move onto focusing on your well-being and emotional wellness. You need to take time for yourself to decompress and move on from the stresses of this draining situation.
Some even manifest the breathing metaphor as a physical symptom of the divorce experience, causing them to hyperventilate.
Metaphor to physical symptom
According to the Respiratory Department at Yeovil Hospital in the United Kingdom, divorce is one of the more common stressful scenarios that causes the physical symptom of hyperventilation to occur.
Hyperventilation is rapid and deep breathing that may leave you feeling breathless, according to the United States National Library of Medicine. The excessive breathing found in hyperventilation creates a low level of carbon dioxide in your blood.
The stresses that cause hyperventilation can be during a panic attack, which are known to be connected to major life transitions like divorce.
Yeovil Hospital stated that hyperventilation can occur even if you have not acknowledged the cause of the distress in your life, and during the divorce experience and even beforehand, you may have been so wrapped up in the daily difficulties of your relationship and the unhealthy dynamic between yourself and your former spouse, that you had failed to see what this dysfunction and stress was doing to your overall health and well-being.
In order to move on from the difficult challenges of divorce and breathe easier again, you cannot allow what dragged you down in your former marriage to drag you down presently. You have to rise above it, in order to move forward.
You may require the assistance of mental health professionals, trained to provide the necessary services and help get you to a healthier place in your life.
In getting to a healthier place, you may gain a sense of peace that was once lost. You can regain your sense of self and allow your thoughts to cancel the noise of what you went through in your previous relationship.
After time passes, you are better equipped to see the events of the past more clearly, because the emotional stress of the situation has most likely subsided, creating opportunity for a better future.
Dan Pearce is an Online Editor for Lexicon, focusing on subjects related to the legal services of customers, Cordell & Cordell and Cordell Planning Partners. He has written countless pieces on MensDivorce.com, detailing the plight of men and fathers going through the divorce experience, as well as the issues seniors and their families experience throughout the estate planning journey on ElderCareLaw.com. Mr. Pearce has managed websites and helped create content, such as the Men’s Divorce Newsletter and the YouTube series, “Men’s Divorce Countdown.” He also has been a contributor on both the Men’s Divorce Podcast and ElderTalk with TuckerAllen.
Mr. Pearce assisted in fostering a Cordell Planning Partners practice area specific for Veterans, as they deal with the intricacies of their benefits while planning for the future. He also helped create the Cordell Planning Partners Resource Guide and the Cordell Planning Partners Guide to Alternative Residence Options, specific for seniors with questions regarding their needs and living arrangements.
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