Question:
My wife has become verbally abusive and is trying to turn my daughter against me. It seems all our recent encounters have ended with her screaming at me in front of our child.
Considering I likely cannot afford an attorney, how can I fight this?
Answer:
I am so sorry to hear about your tense situation. One of the first things I would do is gather evidence of your wife’s alienation and screaming in front of your child.
Are there neighbors who have witnessed these interactions? Are there teachers or school counselors that your daughter has confided in? Do you have text messages or emails in which the verbal abuse is evident or your wife says things that show she is telling your daughter terrible things about you?
Depending on the laws in your state, you may also be able to record these interactions, but please be sure to check with an attorney in your jurisdiction before doing so!
In Colorado, a person can record any conversation that they are a part of, regardless of whether the other person is aware of the recording or not.
However, some states require that everyone who is part of the conversation knows that they are being recorded, so before you record anything, check with a local attorney about the laws in your state.
If you are able to record these interactions, those recordings would be great evidence for the judge.
I would also advise you not to engage in these screaming matches. It will not look good if you are screaming as well, but it will look good if you are able to stay calm when interacting with your wife — especially in front of your daughter.
In Colorado, where I practice, dads have equal right to parenting time with their children until a court says otherwise. If there are no orders in your case, or if no one has filed yet, you have equal rights to spend time with your daughter.
It sounds like it might be time to file for divorce and get some parenting time ordered so that your wife has no choice but to comply.
I understand that finances are tight, but I always say that it is better to do something right the first time rather than trying to fix it later, so I would absolutely recommend finding an attorney in your area to help you file for divorce to make sure that you get the parenting time you deserve.
Remember, I am unable to provide you with anything more than tips on your situation, so please consult a domestic litigation attorney in your area to obtain specific advice as to the laws in your state and how they impact your potential case.
To arrange an initial consultation to discuss divorce rights for men with a Cordell & Cordell attorney, contact Cordell & Cordell.
Mat Camp is a former Lexicon Services Online Editor, who focused on providing a comprehensive look into all aspects of the divorce experience. On MensDivorce.com, he concentrated on issues, such as parenting time, custodial rights, mediation, the division of assets, and so much more.
Mr. Camp used the wealth of experience of Cordell & Cordell attorneys to bring tangible answers to reader questions in Ask a Lawyer articles, as well as offer a step by step process through the divorce experience with Cordell & Cordell Co-Founder and Principal Partner Joseph E. Cordell in Divorce 101: A Guide for Men.
Mr. Camp used thorough research to highlight the challenging reality that those who go through divorce or child custody issues face. He helped foster the continued success of the Men’s Divorce Survival Guide, the Men’s Divorce Podcast, and the Men’s Divorce YouTube series “Attorney Bites.”